upon the difference between a wart & a plague sore, but when one
comes to hidden & obscure ambiguous & equivocal complaints the best
guesser & the oldest practitioner is the best Dr. I sate with him an
hour or two. He made a wry face or two at last, and cried out "Z--ds I"
"have a damn'd pain in my back. What wou'd you have me do"? -- Do? Why
take that Turpentine Glyster "O Curse you now you have got that infernal"
stone into yr head again" Indeed says I, it has never been out yet, & I am
now more confirm'd by that glass of urine than ever I was. --"Why pary whats"
"the matter with that urine? why its bloody -- "It is not. Gataker says"
"it is only exalted Bile" Very Well, quoth I I fancy nature will soon humble
him & his Bile too, & so yr Servant. "Won't you stay a little? "Stay? for
what? to give -- you pain & hear my self insulted & away I went. But
His wife I think persuaded him to take the Glyster next day. He voided a
little very brown stone, --I call'd at the play house & there the Box keeper
told me with Joy in his face that his Master had go rid of the Stone & was
very happy, Is he behind the Scenes? No, but he intends to call here by
and by, -- very well says I, I shall call at his house, say nothing that you
have told me. In he comes, says the boxkeeper. Dr. Monsey is just gone
out of the Green Room. --"You didn't tell him about the Stone? Never I
did Sr. --"then damn yr foolish head & prating Tongue" Well home He
comes. --Your servant Mr. Garrick how do you do? "Pretty Well" as sulky
and as gruff as he is to his wife in Sr. Jn Brute, I couldn't but smile to my
self. -- Some mention was made of the stone. ---What stone says I? "Why the
"stone I voided" The stone you voided? "Yes the stone I voided" as poorish
as an old Wizzon'd Maid in a frosty morning.-- Why says of you had none to
void," Why Verney told all about it" Verney? Yes says I so he did, but I
didn't believe him, for you have told me 20 time she was the greatest liar
that ever spoke with tongues, and now I know him to be so, pon says he
"have done with yr nonsense" Says I I will & throw it all into the fire
& so we parted friends, but o' my conscience he seemed more mad and
chagrin'd at my being right, than pleased at his having got rid of a very
painfull companion --- Now Mr. Dulany don't you think this behaviour
very childish? don't you think this conduct was something of a foolish
head or a wrong Heart? would not you think a gratefull or benevolent
Spirit would have said something like this --"Dear Dr. I ask your pardon
"I have abus'd you, I have been forward, but all is over & give me yr hand."
No, dear Pride shut up his mouth & Tongue too --- Here he was the Emperour
King, Hero, Tyrant, & Bashaw, --At the time of this Sulky fit perhaps it was
was not to be expected, but the best Joke is he never once since took the
least notice of it, nor that puppy Gataker neigher, tho He abus'd me half as
much as Garrick did, but my Spriit was too much elated ever to think it
worth my while to hint to either of em the propriety of some small matter
of this kind. This I made a voluntary sacrifice of to friendship with great
pleasure & was myself as cordially affected towards him as ever!
I have taken up too much of yr Time with this long tedious Detail